Most of us have our eye on a dream job that we’d like to have, and if we’re serious about it, we’re already doing something to make that a reality.
Talking with the people who have that dream job already is a good idea if you know how to do it. Usually, those people have some degree of celebrity. Here are some tips to keep in mind:
- They are human: There’s no reason to be shy about contacting someone you admire and respect in your field. They probably started off just like you, and they also probably remember what that was like. Once again, they are people, so don’t treat them like a means to an end. Contact them to get to know them, not to use them. Don’t worship them either.
- They aren’t Brad Pitt: Unless it’s Brad Pitt or some other mega-star, they probably don’t deal with raving lunatic fans all that much. Rather than cringe at fan contact, they probably enjoy intelligent emails and heartfelt compliments.
- They are busy: You don’t get to the top without being pretty busy. Once you’re at the top, you don’t get any less busy. If you email them, keep it short and to the point.
- They know how to say no: Unless you approach them in person, you’re probably not putting them into some horribly awkward position. They get requests all of the time, and they probably say no to most of them. You’re not imposing if you’re doing it the right way.
- They know how to say YES: Dan Schwabel has gotten interviews with a ton of interesting people for his personal branding enterprise including Donald Trump and Jack Welch. I bet he’s also been rejected more times than an Amway salesman. Point is, sometimes you’ll get a bite.
- They respect potential: If you’re a rising star in your industry, that’ll be appealing to them. As Dan has more wins and success, his yes to no ratio will improve as well. Demonstrate truly impressive interest and success in your life and then in your messages to them, and they’ll be more likely to respond and respond affirmatively. Comment on their blog, meet them when they make appearances, and have some work of your own you can point to if they are interested.
- Famous is a relative term: Anyone in a position to have a public audience is famous to a degree. Would you rather be friends with people at a low or mid level of fame or be a blip on the radar of a mega-star? Both, probably. Make a point of befriending the people you admire, regardless of the size of their audience.
An Example
I’ve contacted Seth Godin by email a few times, and I’ve always gotten a positive response. Seth has several best-selling books to his name as well as one of the most popular blogs around.
Earlier this week, I emailed him what amounted to an impression of him:
Subject: An Observation on Adsense
Hi, Seth,
Some coffee bean sellers are paying big bucks to appear above Gmail emails with the word “coffee” in them. I must have seen the Coffee Fool’s advertisement a thousand times. I’ve never bought a coffee bean in my life.
Problem is, in most cases, the word coffee shows up as a metaphor for socializing: “Let’s grab coffee or something.” Phrases like “brew”, “creamer”, “french roast” or “coffee beans” are much more likely to hit the target as well as be less expensive.
Who should buy the word “coffee”? Facebook. “Lunch” should belong to LinkedIn. Leave “snacks” and “meals” to real food, but “coffee” and “lunch” belong to socializing.
I respect your work and aspire to similar success as a thinker and author. Thanks for taking a moment to read this.
-Chuck
He replied:
very thoughtful riff, Chuck
thanks.
I’d received more enthusiastic responses in the past, but I took that as a compliment that he read it and thought enough of it to reply.
I pressed a bit:
Of course, now my entire sidebar in Gmail is full of coffee bean links, but that’s no mystery.
I would very much like to receive your occasional and casual mentorship in my goals to be a thought-leader and an author.
Is this something you would consider in one form or another?
I’m 23 and am pursuing a path as a full-time writer while working part time to pay rent.
Again, thanks for your time,
Chuck
At this point, I realized that the odds of him saying yes were slim. That’s a pretty bold thing to ask. On the other hand, he might be willing to give me a 5 minute phone call every now and then.
chuck
the best I can offer is my writing
I’m just too too swamped
I’m sorry
I thanked him and asked if I could write about our conversation, explaining what I wanted to say, and he agreed enthusiastically. It was definitely worth asking, and when something of mine shows up on his radar, it might ring a bell. For all I know, he’s subscribed to my RSS feed. I know that Darren Rowse has.
Who do you know of that you wish you could actually know?
10 responses so far ↓
1 Joe Drinker // Oct 31, 2007 at 1:42 pm
One of the coolest people I ever met was Dave Shea, the creator of CSS Zen Garden. He was a speaker at a conference I was at in Boston, and while I was avoiding two particularly dull sessions I was in the lobby having coffee and trying to get some work done. He sat down next to me and we probably spent 30 minutes chatting, just about random stuff. Of course the designer in me was stoked, but once I figured out that he was a code guy and really wasn’t all that thrilled with the celebrity, it took the pressure off.
I try to keep that in mind when meeting other “famous” people, so much so that they don’t tend to faze me much. I avoid everyone to the same extent.
2 Chuck Westbrook // Oct 31, 2007 at 2:00 pm
@Joe Drinker– Great story. Something I forgot to include in my list but perhaps should is that you ought not treat them like superhumans or subhumans.
They deserve your respect and attention, but they don’t deserve to be treated like a means to an end. They don’t deserve your worship either.
3 Lindsey Pollak // Oct 31, 2007 at 4:59 pm
Great post and so true. I’ve written to Kate White (editor in chief of Cosmo), Keith Ferrazzi (author of Never Eat Alone) and others and have amost always gotten a nice reply and a few nuggets of wisdom. Your point about keeping the email request brief is essential. I’ve found if you ask a quick and specific question you get a response. If you write a novel you get ignored.
The same goes for blog comments, so I’ll keep this short and sweet…
4 Chuck Westbrook // Oct 31, 2007 at 10:43 pm
@Lindsey Pollak– Thanks for stopping by and commenting. (For those who don’t know, Lindsey qualifies as a bit of a celebrity in the career niche.)
You know, it’s funny, but I wrote Guy Kawasaki well before I realized how famous he was. I read Art of the Start in a night and went to the computer to ask him a question. He responded, no shock to me, but in hindsight, I might not have tried if I’d known how influential and important he is.
5 Modite - What gives you the right to be a young leader // Oct 31, 2007 at 11:06 pm
[…] in, sure. It’s a challenge and it’s hard work and it’s rewarding and it’s fantastic. But leaders aren’t all that different from the rest of […]
6 Rosie // Nov 1, 2007 at 8:32 am
Way to be bold, Chuck!
I have a band that I have followed for years when I lived in Ohio, and they finally came to a city about 2 hours from where I live. I got to talk to the lead singer for 10 mins and reminisce about their early shows that I had attended. It was great to chat with someone whose music that really had meaning.
Yeah sometimes I get starstruck when deciding to approach speakers at conferences or just people I admire a lot. But you’re right, they are just human. Plus it’s always a good feeling when you do have the opportunity to chat with them.
7 Ryan Paugh // Nov 1, 2007 at 6:40 pm
Chuck,
It’s all about biting your lip and taking the plunge. If you fail, you fail. But if you do nothing, you fail anyway.
On a personal note:
I once met James Gandolfini in a restroom. We talked about how the toilet was overflowing and his kid really needed to go. Awesome guy.
I also met Mike Tyson in the Newark airport right after he bit Evander Holyfield’s ear off. He wasn’t so awesome, but still let me get a picture.
8 Monica // Nov 2, 2007 at 3:19 pm
Great post.
The most amazing opportunities have come my way because I wasn’t afraid to ask. I once befriended a very famous NY Theatre Director - all because I asked for 15 minutes of his time. At the end of the 15 minutes (which actually became a few hours) he liked me enough to let me observe rehearsals, go backstage, etc.
Approaching life (and hence, your career) with a “why not ask” attitude can lead to great things. (I state that as if I really live by that motto, but really, I’m preaching to the choir here.)
9 Beth // Nov 3, 2007 at 9:37 am
Indeed, a great post. After reading it, you inspired me to send a note to a personal hero of mine, John Kelso (columnist for our local newspaper). I’ve sent Kelso notes in the past and he’s been great about responding - I even convinced him to show up at our high school reunion (back in the day he’d posed as a student in our class). But this time, I asked him a specific question about how he became a humorist and columnist and his response was, “call me and let’s discuss”. Now I just have to follow your advice about not sounding like a raving lunatic fan-girl when I actually speak to him.
Thanks so much for the tips and encouragement!
10 BillyWarhol // Jan 3, 2008 at 12:17 pm
Great Post! I’m just in the process of doing this Today! (I can’t procrastinate any longer - 2008 gotta DO IT!!)
I think yer advice on not Swooning over them is Excellent - I had the Good Fortune to meet quite a few Celebs when they were in town for the Toronto Film Festival + they are quite approachable*
;))
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